This time last year, my husband was in Scotland, and I was frazzled. We had something like 8 2500 word assignments to write in 3 months, and a week's placement in the middle. Communication with Simon was very scarce, as he was always busy, and when we did communicate, we often fell out as texts and Facebook can cause so many barriers with there being no body language or facial expressions to decode.
Honestly, it was the hardest period of time I've had to endure! However, we've come out the other end even stronger than before. I do remember, though, having to seek counselling, as there were times when I just couldn't cope.
Anxiety and depression are close acquaintances of mine. I've had to live with them for a few years - in fact, 7 years now (has it really been that long?). In the present day, I can honestly say I feel free of them, but there are days when I wake up and think, "wow, I am not feeling today," or I have a panic attack over something that is not even real.
But look at what I have been blessed with: a loving husband, an incredible family, some of the best friends I could have asked for and a secure home. Why is it that we focus on the negative, when the positive is slapping us around the face screaming, "appreciate me!"? Unfortunately, it is down to human nature. We are broken people, but we can call on God to help us. Sometimes I forget that. Sometimes I forget that in the list of things I am being, I need to also be a worshipper.
Psalms 25:17 says this: Relieve the trouble of my heart and free me from my anguish. That is my prayer for myself, but also for those people around me that I know are hurting, lonely or anxious. Because, as Jesus said, in my favourite of all passages from the Gospel:
Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own. (Matthew 6:34).
(P.S. I apologise in advance for how random this post was, but it was just a splurge, again.)
